"I think God wants me to be happy"
The man left, leaving behind his marriage and his two children. A year later he found another woman who made him feel “alive”. Her first marriage had been a struggle from the start, and it had only gotten worse. He wasn't happy; neither did she. He had always seen divorce as wrong, but his situation was unique. When asked from a biblical perspective about his plans to remarry, he acknowledged that he had no rights but said, "I think God wants me to be happy."
The girl was only sixteen years old. She came from a family with separated parents. Her father had divorced her mother ten years earlier. Despite being popular at school, she still struggled with insecurity. She craved the attention the boys gave her. She knew fornication was wrong, but her situation was unique. She was alone and being with "him" made her feel happy and secure. When asked from a biblical perspective on her immoral intimacy, she acknowledged that she wasn't right, but said, "I think God wants me to be happy." She never imagined she would get pregnant after just once. She was scared. A baby would change all her plans for the future. She got depressed. She went to the clinic and poured out her heart to a counselor. She couldn't think about an abortion. God wouldn't like that. The counselor said, "I think God wants you to be happy."
The woman, divorced for sixteen years, had had a hard life. Her "ex" had remarried and was happy. Her eldest daughter had left home five years earlier; they hadn't spoken since the abortion. Her son had just graduated from high school. None of her children had ever obeyed the gospel. Bitterness and discouragement seized her heart. The church she was a part of was small and aging. She wasn't happy. Her friends from work invited her to their church. She went. She met people her age in the same circumstances as her. They became friends. The small, aging church was getting smaller and older. When the woman approached the woman about her trading God's truth for a lie, she acknowledged that her new church did some things she wasn't comfortable with, but said, "I think God wants me to be happy."
The phrase “I think God wants me to be happy” has been used by many to justify their immorality and backsliding. The logic is based on an egocentric definition of happiness and the assumption that God wants that kind of happiness for us. This logic ignores or is blind to all unhappiness in its path. The man divorces to be happy, but leaves behind an unhappy family. The girl commits fornication to be happy and increases her unhappiness. She aborts to be happy and deprives her child of life, freedom and happiness. The mother abandons her faith to be happy. All of this happens because people assume that God wants them to be happy.
Can you imagine? Eve notes the forbidden fruit's potential to make her happy and reasons: “I know what God said 'you shall not eat' but I think God wants me to be happy” (Genesis 3:6). We must consider that God's limits are set for our happiness.
Ahab couldn't be happy unless he had a certain vineyard. "I know God said 'Thou shalt not kill' but I think God wants me to be happy." Did Ahab and Jezebel consider Naboth's happiness (1 Kings 21:4-7)?
Demas may have reasoned, “I know I must stay and work with Paul, but I think God wants me to be happy” (2 Timothy 4:10). The same thought can affect us if our personal happiness is determined by events and circumstances in this present world. Many reason and excuse themselves from sacrificial spiritual service because deep down they think God wants them to be happy!
In our abundance we become obsessed with the importance of being happy. Solomon did it all and concluded that it is vanity (Ecclesiastes 2:1-11). George Bernard Shaw joked: "The secret to being miserable is having the free time to worry about whether you are happy or not." Certainly, for many, the search for “happiness” has only brought greater misery.
People are looking for happiness in all the wrong places. Most recall Solomon's conclusion: “Fear God and keep his commandments; for this is every man's duty" (Ecclesiastes 12:13), but he does not realize that this conclusion is also the key to true and lasting happiness. "Blessed are the people whose God is the LORD!" (Psalm 144:15) and whose hope is in him (Psalm 146:5). Fearing the Lord and walking in His ways brings happiness to everything from the food you eat to the family you share it with (Psalm 128:1-4). Blessing comes to those who honor, obey, and trust in the Lord God (Proverbs 16:20; 28:14; 29:18). It is not the pursuit of happiness that brings happiness but the pursuit of God's will.
Exemplary models of faith are not found seeking happiness. What kind of example would Job be if he had simply given up his faith to be happier? It is his resistance to extreme unhappiness that makes him remarkable (James 5:10-11). What if Mary had decided that she would be happier if she aborted her Son? In the end, Mary found her happiness in being able to serve God's will (Luke 1:38).
If Jesus had decided that he would be happier in heaven we would be lost! We are called to imitate Jesus' unselfish attitude (Philippians 2:5-8). When a man divorces his wife for personal happiness, he is not valuing others more than himself (verse 3). When a woman aborts her child to gain happiness, she is looking out for her own interests and not her baby's interests (verse 4). These attitudes do not reflect the mind of Christ.
God did not call us to happiness as we define happiness. Rather, we are called to suffer, if need be, for the cause of Christ (1 Peter 2:19-21). It is better to suffer for doing good than for doing evil in a misguided effort to be happy (3:17). There is no value in suffering like an evildoer, yet if one suffers like a Christian there is no shame in it, but it is an occasion to rejoice and be content (4:12-16).
Does God want you to be happy? For sure! However, the scriptures that tell you that God wants your eternal happiness also say that he hates divorce (Malachi 2:16), that we should flee fornication (1 Corinthians 6:18), that this God hates the hands that shed innocent blood (Proverbs 6:17), that we must be faithful unto death (Revelation 2:10).
No part of God's word can be ignored or compromised to guarantee the happiness God offers. Yes, God wants us to be happy, which is why we must hate what he hates and love what he loves. Jesus said, “If ye know these things, blessed are ye if ye do them” (John 13:17). If you don't have the happiness that God offers, then you either don't know the things of God or you aren't doing them.
– by Andy Diestelkamp
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